Diary Episode: Control Is Costing Me $100K Months

Megan Yelaney:

Welcome back to Business Not As Usual. I am alone with you, my friend. The last 2 episodes have been expert interviews. They’ve been amazing expert interviews, but you’re stuck with me. And, you know, I almost didn’t release an episode this week, which if you’re new to my world, this is going to be a little bit more of a personal update. But I promise it’ll still be valuable. And hopefully you’ll want to stick around or go back and listen and then stick around for the future episodes. But I almost didn’t record, honestly, because this week was just busy and I didn’t prep as I usually do. My best friend was visiting until Tuesday morning. Normally I record my podcasts, if they’re not expert interviews that have been previously recorded, I’ll record them on Mondays. And we were out and about gallivanting. We had our boys’ 2-and-a-half-year checkup. You know, we just were spending time together and I like barely worked on Monday. I did like my newsletter and that was it. So I just didn’t get it done. And then I was knee-deep in client work, onboarding tons of new clients for TDE, which was so amazing. I am gonna do a launch update episode next week. I do promise I will have time. I already have time slotted to do that on Monday, but I didn’t wanna rush that. And so I was like, all right, I’m just not gonna do an episode. And then I really just started to think about content and things I wanna talk about. And I was like, I, I just wanna talk this out. I wanna talk this out. And I feel like the best way to talk this out is with my podcast people. And so again, this is gonna be more of like a diary episode, if you will. So just quick life update. So, and, and how things that I’m thinking about moving forward, especially with the podcast. I love guests. I love having really valuable guests. I just had 2 back to back that are absolutely incredible. 2 of my favorite interviews I’ve done in a while. But I have this pull, I have this craving to really go deeper with the podcast in a way I haven’t before and make it basically all solo episodes with possibly some sprints or seasons of interviews and interviews that are more themed. And I actually have been a part of this kind of process with a couple other people’s podcasts where they have like a theme on sales or a theme on marketing or a theme on authenticity or whatever it is, right? And I’m just part of the guests for that theme. And so they’ll have a bunch of episodes in a row on that theme and then they go back to their solos. I like that a lot. I think that’s a really cool strategy, really cool concept. So I might explore that a little bit. But another thing I thought that, please, if you like message me if you like this, I wanna run like a summit style, but not like a summit where you’re watching presentations necessarily, more like a, podcast where I interview successful entrepreneurs and ask them about their edge and how their edge has made them the money it’s made them and will continue to, and how it’s evolved and changed. Like, I have this craving to do that. I think that’d be so freaking cool, um, just to be like, what is your edge? Let’s talk it through. How did you figure it out? All that stuff. So let me know if that sounds cool to you, because maybe that’ll be— I don’t know if that’ll be like an opt-in, like a separate private podcast or part of this one. I’m not sure. Ideas flowing. But basically, quick update. I’m gonna go back. I’m actually looking at the, the calendar. This is what life has been like since April. I’m recording this on July 17th. You’ll probably get it delivered if you are listening to this in real time on the, on the 20th, but maybe later in the day cuz my husband is literally leaving for a trip. Didn’t think there was an episode this week. And I’m gonna be like, hey, just kidding. Can you edit this before you leave? So he might not be able to edit it. He’s going to play poker in Atlantic City. Go Mike, bring home some money, honey. Fun fact, my husband used to be a professional poker player. Like literally that’s how he made his living before we met. And then when we were dating, he did it for a long time, but not like full, full income kind of thing, but just for more fun and sometimes bringing great income and then sometimes nothing. That’s just like poker in general, but he’s very good at it, very skilled. And For me, with my theater, like, it’s his passion. He loves it. He misses it. And so one of the things I’m most proud of in our relationship so far as parents that I think we do really well is we make time for what the other person needs. We make time for our, like, things that fill us up. Like, I did my show. He’s going to play poker. I have my best friend visiting. You know, if he wants to go on a trip with his friends, He’ll do that. Our motto, except for obviously if it’s like a trip like this, we have to have more of a conversation at one of our meetings and schedule this ahead of time. But our motto otherwise, or not our motto, our way of doing things is like, I’ll just send him a Google Calendar invite or he’ll send me a Google Calendar invite for like a night we want to go out. Or like I’m going to a friend’s like review show, like a theater kind of event on a Monday night in August. Very random. Do I ever go to the city on a Monday night in August? Yeah. I want to support a friend. I want to see my friends. It’s my fiddler people. Uh, and so I just sent him an invite and he accepted. And that’s like our way of literally reserving things we want to do. But I just think, um, I’m just proud of us. That’s all I just want to say. I’m really proud of us for doing that. And it just lets us both have lives outside of just mom and dad and husband and wife and entrepreneur. And I think it’s like really filling for us, like prioritizing friendships, prioritizing Family, prioritizing like family outside of just our, you know, immediate family and prioritizing like what fuels us and poker fuels him. So he’s actually gone this weekend and next weekend. My mom is visiting me as this weekend, uh, to help with the boys. But while she’s a help, she can’t like physically do a ton. So it’s super helpful in many, many ways, of course. Uh, but I’m still solo momming it. I’m still like there every second of the day, but I have my babysitter here right now. It’s Friday morning. So anyway, setting the scene for you. I wanna take you back. It’s July 17th. I wanna take you back to April, April 20th. You know what, actually even a little bit. I wanna take you back to April 10th. So April, actually April 11th. April 11th was, I believe, the first rehearsal, or it wasn’t the first, but it was like the second or third rehearsal for Fiddler. But it was the first weekend that we had back-to-back rehearsals. So, uh, I was doing a show, if you didn’t know, I was doing a show called Fiddler on the Roof. I played Tzeitel Frumacera, if you’re familiar with the show. And we had rehearsals starting in April. We had like one rehearsal end of March and then a bunch of holidays. And so, uh, like, um, yeah, there was just a bunch of stuff in between that. I’m forgetting what— oh, Easter. I’m like, what holiday was then? Uh, and so Saturday the 11th and Sunday Sunday the 12th, we had back-to-back like 4 and a half hours each day, and then the following weekend as well. So the 18th and 19th, 4 and a half hours each day. And then the 20th through the 23rd, I hosted a retreat for my mastermind clients. So I was gone upstate New York, away from my boys for the first time for like 3 full nights— Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. Yeah, 3 full nights, longest I’ve been away from them. And you know, really being on with my clients, fully in coach and facilitator mode. And it was the best retreat I’ve ever run. It was so filling in ways I did not expect. Like, you know, when you’re hosting and on so much, it can be draining and amazing and fun, but also you’re like, whoa, I’m exhausted, I need to recover. And I didn’t feel that way. Like, I literally came back being like, whoa, I feel like I just went to a retreat where I wasn’t facilitating, even though I was the whole time. Like, I feel like I just got my cup filled. It was quite an interesting experience. I don’t think I’ve quite— I’ve never had, as I’m reflecting, I’ve never had an experience like this at a retreat where I fully felt like an equal energy exchange. And it shouldn’t always actually feel that way. Like, I don’t think it’s bad if you don’t. I’ve never had, and I’ve hosted wonderful retreats. But usually as the facilitator and the coach, you’re a little tired, you’re drained. You’re like, don’t talk to me for a while, I’m exhausted. Yeah. And I truly did not feel that way. Like, I left so inspired, so rejuvenated. It was actually perfect timing. But when I think about it, it was like back-to-back rehearsals, leave for the retreat. I come home on the Thursday. I have again that Saturday and Sunday back-to-back rehearsals, and then we go into 2 straight weeks of tech. And what that means is pretty much every night from like 7 to 10:30, 11 o’clock. I had rehearsals except for maybe— it was like 5 nights out of 7 for the— for each week. So 2 weeks in a row, on top of serving my clients, on top of being a mom where I’m spending a lot of time with my boys, on top of being a wife, on top of all the stuff, right? And then I was also prepping for a launch for, um, June. Now that’s end of April, that seems so far away, but if you’ve ever launched, if you know You’re not just launching the week of; you’re doing a lot of prep ahead of time to warm people up. And I was really thinking about two offers. And again, I’m going to talk about this next week because I launched two offers—one publicly, one privately—and it’s pretty cool to see what we did privately behind the scenes when the public offer was happening. So, anywho, just want to. Put that out there for a little seeding for next week. So we go into May and my show starts— I’m forgetting the exact day. I think it was the 8th. Oh no, no, it was the 16th. Yeah, we had the first 2 weeks of May, uh, and then my show started the 16th. It was a Saturday. And then once we’re in actual shows, it’s way less busy because you just have— we had 8 shows. We didn’t— I think we had 8, maybe we had 7, but not a ton of shows. So it wasn’t like super, super time-consuming in that way. And it was so filling, it was so fun. But during that time, I was getting private podcast, Main Character Energy, ready to go. And then I was getting my, um, I was also selling into my current clients into a continuation program. So all of my TDE clients who had finished my group program, signing them into continuation. I was also signing on evergreen clients. I think we signed 13 clients within April and May into that program. And then, um, which, which is $2,500 or $4,000 at the time. And then I was prepping for an event I wanted to host on June 22nd, which if you’ve ever done an event, you know, you can’t prep The week before, you need many weeks. Now, the event that I ran, I had run in January, but it was like a, a summer sales edition. So it was, it wasn’t like creating anything from scratch. So much easier. Oh my gosh. So much easier. It did really well in January. I said, let’s do it again. And so that was really, um, that would, that was great cuz it just made it a lot easier in many ways. But we go from, you know, the pod, the getting the podcast stuff ready while doing the show, while re-signing people into my continuation program, while coaching my current clients. Also signing a new, um, high-ticket private client one-on-one, um, while then going into the prep for my free event. My show ended on the 31st. My event promo started the week of June 8th. So we end the show, we go pretty much right the week after, right into promo for that. We run the event the week of the 22nd. I open cart the week of the 28th. And between all of this, I turned 39 on June 14th, and I had some other emotional things come up, if you will. So my dad passed away on May 26th, 2023. So obviously May 26th is a— it’s a day. It’s a rough day. And this was the 3rd year. And it was interesting. I was talking to a couple friends who’ve lost parents in particular. I’m sure you feel like this with anyone that you’ve like I’m sure you feel like this with a sibling, anyone who you like don’t know life without them, like you’ve never existed without them. It literally feels like a limb was taken off. You’re like, wait, your identity really shifts. It’s, it’s wild, quite wild experience. And the third year was the hardest so far. Like it was, I didn’t expect that. Like the first, of course you’re like, yeah, this sucks. But like the first of everything is kind of expected. And I think because it’s, it’s removed enough That it’s not like people are checking in on you, you know? And I remember seeing this reel. I told you this was going to be a little tangenty. I’m going to get to the topic at hand that probably hooked you into this, I promise. It has so much to do with all of it, but it’s— I promise there’s like a central thread with all of this. But there’s this thing, like, people get nervous. Yeah. or, or they don’t want to upset you, and they don’t— which I totally get. I probably did the same thing, honestly, before my dad died. Like, they don’t want to bring it up because they don’t want it to upset you. They’re like, oh, this is upsetting, this is sad, I don’t want to bring it up. When— and I get another— everyone’s different, so some people might feel that way who’ve lost a parent or lost anyone, and they’re like, I don’t want to talk about it. Like, I don’t want to talk about it, don’t ever bring it up. But for me, and I know for my husband, who also lost his dad a year before I lost mine. It’s— we want to talk about our dads. We love talking about our dads. When people reach out and ask us how we are about it, I feel so loved. So loved when someone’s just like, hey, I know today’s a tough day for you. I’m thinking of you. You know, like on Father’s Day. I had so many clients and friends do that on Father’s Day. And it was like, I literally get like emotional thinking about it. Just that quick message. Hey, thinking of you. It made my day. It made it so much better. It made the day so much better. A very hard day. Like, that goes a long way. You don’t need to say anything profound. Just, hey, I know today’s a hard day. I’m thinking of you. When someone says they’re thinking of you, how good does that feel? It feels good to be thought of. It feels— wanting people caring about you, that’s the best feeling in the world. Right? You want people to care about you. You want people to love you. You want people to be like, hey, you’re so important to me that you’re top of mind on today. I know today’s hard and you come to mind because I care about you. That is the best feeling. And so everyone’s different. I will say, don’t get mad at me if someone is mad at you for this, but from my experience, I think it’s great to reach out to someone when you know it’s a tough day for them and just say, I’m thinking about you. That’s it. Goes a long way. Okay. I’m off my, my, my, I don’t know, uh, my stage, my platform. I’m losing the phrases right now. But May 26th is tough, right? So that was right in the middle of everything, right before my show ends, which is also an emotional experience. Ending a show that you become a family with these people, it was so hard. Like, I felt so on during that show. I love, love, loved every second of it. It was really, really hard to end that show. Like, very sad. So that combined with that, and then It’s my birthday. And again, if you’ve lost someone, any holiday or celebration always has an air of sadness. It sounds very depressing, but it is just the truth. It doesn’t like make the event like not— you don’t want it to happen. There’s always— there’s still more celebration. But like my birthdays especially, my dad would literally call me at midnight and sing to me. And or at 6:16 AM when I was born and sing to me. He was a singer. So one, he was an incredible singer. He’s the only person who could sing to me happy birthday and I wanted to listen. No offense to anyone who sang happy birthday to me, I love you, but it’s just not going to sound as good as my professional singer dad. Like, he just sounds great. He was a singer. And then also the 13th was the night that the Knicks won. The Knicks won the championship. So it was— I was actually up. I’m never up that late. I stayed up past midnight. And so It became my birthday and I was up actually. Normally I’d be sleeping. And I think because I was up and like didn’t get a text from my dad, it just hit me in a way that it hasn’t the last couple years. ‘Cause I was sleeping the last few years and in throes of postpartum, you know? So I guess I didn’t notice it as much, but I was like, oh, I’m awake and my dad didn’t text me or call me and sing to me and leave me a voicemail knowing I’m sleeping. Yeah. And it just hit me. And so like, I had a good birthday, don’t get me wrong, but it was— I was kind of sad the whole day. It was weird. I was like, snap out of it. But I’m not gonna— you feel how you feel, you know, let yourself feel. And then a week later, literally exactly a week later, was Father’s Day. So I mean, it’s triple whammy, right? Just triple freaking whammy. During all of this, I am prepping for this event that started the day after the 22nd. Running this event. And then we had— and I’ll share more of this, um, next week when I do more of a launch recap— but we, we just had some tech stuff happen that was very upsetting and frustrating because I’ve put money into ads for the first time in so many years into this. Um, and I’m gonna share this at the event. I would say I think it was 75% of the people who joined joined my email list this year. Uh, and most very recently. So that was pretty cool. Um, I, out of the 15 people who joined, I only really knew like 2. Like one had worked with me, friend. Um, but everyone else I didn’t really know. So that was so fricking cool. Like, wow, what a win. Like anyway, I’m get— I will do it an actual deep dive, um, on the next episode, I promise. So when I was like, you know, just going through all of those motions and then running this, and then the first day having this big tech snafu, like I was just upset. And then my babysitter was sick the week before. Obviously she can’t help that, and I’m glad she’s much better obviously now, but that was a lot of time. I think it was 2 or 3 days that I missed a lot of hours of work that I would— was going to prep for the week after. Now, I had my slideshows all done. I had the morning of emails, but the replay emails are things I usually do in the moment anyway, because I want to like find things from the chat and, you know, reference things and all that. But I wasn’t as ahead on my content as I usually am. Um, and so it just added a lot. And I was very proud of the content. The content was great, but I was creating more in the moment than I ever do those 2 weeks because of a lot of that stuff— losing time with the tech issue, losing time with the babysitter being sick. And just because we had things back to back, I didn’t have as much capacity to create ahead of time as I normally do. And I went through all of that. I learned so many things again I’m going to share next week that went well, that didn’t go well, that I should not have done. And By the end of that, I was like, oh my gosh, I am ready for a break. Like, I need like some time off. I don’t need like a ton of time off. I just need like a few days of doing nothing. And the funny part is when I actually look at my work amount, I worked like the least amount in May. Like, I really didn’t work a ton because of the show, but I wasn’t like just chilling. I was go, go, go. And so when I say all of this leading up to right now, We have not stopped moving and it’s been such fueling stuff. Obviously, besides the emotional stuff, like the actual event, I really enjoyed the launch conversations and content. I actually really enjoyed, even though I didn’t like the last minute-ness of a lot of things. I, the show was amazing. The retreat was amazing. Like these are all great things. You know, obviously the emotionality of my dad and all of that was tough, but everything else was full and amazing. Things can be full and amazing, and you can still be like, woof, I’m a little tired. I need like a break for like a second. I need to do nothing. And so my best friend came to visit, and for 4 days, like, not— we did a lot, but like nothing. We just enjoyed each other’s company. We ran errands. We had a birthday party for my boys, and it was so fun. It was the most perfect weather. I couldn’t, couldn’t get over how perfect it was. Like, we couldn’t have asked for a better day. So much family time, delicious food, cocktails, like things that— like indulgence in a way we don’t normally. My tummy was hurting a little bit on Monday. When she left on Tuesday, I was like, oh, my stomach hurts a little bit. But overall, it was just exactly what I needed to like recharge and just do nothing. Just be, be, just be present, right? Not be productive. Not go, go, go. It was really, really amazing. And so as I’m getting to the point of the, the main topic that I’ll probably just wrap up with for a few minutes, as I was reflecting on quarter 2 and prepping for quarter 3, I got close. I did get close to my $200K quarter goal. I didn’t hit it, but I got pretty close and As I was reflecting on that, and as I was reflecting on the launch, and as I was reflecting on— I should say launches, cuz one was behind the scenes, one was front-facing, which is another thing to launch 2 programs at once. I’ll tell you more about that next week. Okay. It all worked out, but man, it was a lot. I probably need to like space things out next time. Although in some ways I think it really is why it worked out so well. Um, But I just realized as I was also prepping for Q3, I haven’t like really talked about the $100K month cash goal in a bit because I’ve been so focused on all the other things and doing the things and, and supporting the clients and, and onboarding and, and, you know, being there for my boys and everything. And when I was sitting down with my nervous system regulation coaches who are also co-coaches inside of TDE, as well as past TDE grads. I mean, we’re just, we joke around that we just pay each other in many ways constantly. Um, when I was like really sitting down and writing out some questions that they ask for check-ins and all of that, one of the biggest things that I kind of realized was what I am struggling most with to scale to $100K months. Is control, is letting go of control. And I don’t know if I realized that until I had this time, because when my friend was visiting, I’d wake up like a tiny bit earlier to get the boys up and everything. But I had a little bit of time to reflect and I wasn’t working. I was like truly taking that time off. And I was just like, hmm. Hmm. We had a really great May. We had a good June. It wasn’t as good as May, but we had a good June even though we had these launches. We had payment plans for the one behind the scenes, the launch behind the scenes. It was a much bigger launch and it was a lot of payment plans. So lots of monthly recurring revenue, which is nice. We love that. But it wasn’t— I thought maybe that would be the first $100K cash month and it wasn’t. And Also, when I was really looking at a couple things that I could have done better in my launch and just ways I’ve set up my program, I’m realizing that I struggle more with control than I want to admit. So I’m admitting it to you. And I also think that while yes, I, I truly do want to hit this goal I, I think I had this, like, the second I announced it, I felt all eyes were on me, which is just not true. We just, you know, we see everything we do, so we think everyone else sees it. And it’s like, nope, very small percentage of your people actually see your content, and they just care more about themselves because we’re all, we’re all humans, right? We’re all selfish humans at the end of the day, worrying about our own stuff. But I just felt this immense pressure to, like, do it quick. And I’ve talked about this before, but I don’t know, upon reflecting over the last like 2 weeks since I’ve like just finished up launch, got people onboarded, had time with my best friend, I, I don’t want to say I don’t want to hit that goal because I do. Deep down I do. I want to hit that goal. I want to get back to that, but I really need to do a lot of inner work to get there. And I know that. I know what’s stopping it is me. It’s— there’s some things I have to shift with my business model in some ways, but that can’t happen unless I let go of control. And I know it. I see it. And I think that’s so much easier said than done. And I’m actively working on it. I have coaches helping me with this. But man, it’s like when you can see the path and you’re like, I know, I think I know what I need to do, and I can see the trajectory and I can see the timeline. And wow, this inner work, this identity shift is a lot— it’s a lot harder because then I— then you realize, you know, when I, when I hit $80K to $100K pretty consistently back in the day. It was in such a different way. And I’m not just business model, I controlled so much. I was in every ounce of my business. I was coaching every single client. I was so hands-on. I was working 40 to 50 hour weeks. Plus sometimes, and many aspects of it I loved. Like it wasn’t like I’m burning myself out into the ground all the time. Some of it was actually I really loved doing it. So as again, as I was like really, really thinking this through and looking at what I did in the past, it’s been this low. I don’t know if low level, high level, but maybe just not. As aware level of control that I’ve had because I’ve been the one coaching the clients. I’ve been the one reviewing things. I’ve been the one doing everything. And pretty much everything I did was high ticket for that reason. And I had some courses that were self-paced, but that wasn’t like the main moneymaker. It maybe like got people into my world. All that to say, as I am wanting to scale, And if I’m being honest, like, my real desire is to make that much money working 20 hours a week. I almost feel selfish saying that, to be honest. Like, like, who am I to want to work part-time making that kind of money? And then I’m like, what? This is the whole point of entrepreneurship. Like, this is the whole freaking point is we get to do this stuff. We Figure it out. We spend the time and the energy figuring out how to crack that code and do it. And I’m committed, committed to figuring it out. And I think I’ve figured out a bit, but I’ve also figured out that I’m the one holding myself back the most, which, I mean, isn’t that always the case? It’s always the case, right? And I have to be willing to let go of some control. I have to be willing To not be the one looking over every little thing. And I have to be willing to realize that people can still get results and forward motion without my critique or feedback on everything. And that’s hard when, like, the last year and a half, that’s been a lot of it. You know, it’s a really hard thing sometimes to take what you do naturally and truly put it out in a way that people can just get. And when I’m being honest, I think I’ve said that like 5 times in the last few sentences. It’s annoying. Stop it, Megan. The truth of it is basically saying the same thing. You’re like, what you do so naturally with people, ’cause I hear this a lot from my clients, is like, I just, it’s so hard for me to do things other than high-ticket group or one-on-one because I know that they need me. That’s not scalable, right? That’s, that’s the opposite of scalable. If every dollar you make is— even if you can bring more people on, but you even have to do a little bit more, that’s still not scalable, right? And I think the thing that we— and I’m lumping myself in here— have to realize is even if someone doesn’t have your direct feedback on something, if you’re teaching them the philosophies and your frameworks and you’re giving them examples and you’re giving them tools They’re gonna be so much further than they would’ve been without it. Sure, will they be at the same place as your high-ticket one-on-ones who get you, you know, so much more? Probably not. Some people might be, but probably not. But can they afford that? Can you, you know, afford to take all those people on? They’re gonna still be so much further. And I’m literally telling you this to tell myself this. It’s hard. It’s hard when like, I know, I know, I mean, the last, these last 2 weeks I’m in, this was the, as I’m recording this, this is the end of week 1 of a new slew of students coming into the program. And because the first week is onboarding, this was like the first coaching week. And I reviewed so many stories and so many frameworks. It’s pretty much all I’ve been doing this week. And As I’m reviewing them and sending them feedback and then being like, oh my gosh, I never would have gotten that out of this. Like, I’m so freaking excited. I finally feel seen. Like, like some of the comments I’ve gotten have been incredible and it feels good. It feels good to get that feedback. It feels good to be like, oh wow, you just did something for me. I just got all my money’s worth in this one thing. That feels good. And if I if I am just relying on that to build, I can’t scale because I can only do that for so many people. I can’t look at 50 students, you know, in, in a week. Origin story. I just can’t. I can’t do that working 20 hours a week, no matter how much I get my AI up to date. And that’s another thing is like, I, I was working on having some help with like some skills and things with AI. And what I have just found is that when it comes to like nuanced things like story and framework, it doesn’t shorten the time. It just doesn’t. It might help like pull out a couple things that I’m like, oh yeah, that’s a great thing. But I still read every single word. I still look through everything. And again, call to control thing that I don’t think is a control thing. I think that’s just quality work, and that’s important to me. But could I train someone else up? Could I help someone else figure that out? Could I create a training to, to show people how I edit a story so that they can see, oh, here’s the next step, here’s how Meg edits and brings out the theme, so that they’re not just relying on me to do it, but I can show them how to do it for themselves, right? Yes. I can. And again, they’re going to be so much further than if they did it on their own. And so as I’m just like thinking through these things of really scaling and how can I not only like to reach the income goal, but like this process, I’m one week in every— this happens every single time I have a new group of people. It unlocks so much for people. And when I see that, I’m like, man, I want everyone to freaking have this. I want everyone to have this, like this clarity and this excitement in their business again. Like what I’ve been able to experience this week with these students is it’s so exciting. And I just, I want more people to have that opportunity. And I don’t want it to be limited because I’m limited in how many stories I can review or how many frameworks I can review, you know? And that is really something I’ve just been thinking a lot through and just going, Megan, you got to let go of a little control. You’ve got to let go of a little control. And this is where, like, I’m redoing a little bit of, um, the beginning of phase 2 of my program, which I kind of redo a little bit of that every few months because social changes so much. I learn how to communicate things even better, even quicker, because again, my goal is that you don’t need me to give you feedback for everything for you to move forward. And so I am always redoing it. And I, at first, I was talking to my mentor about it. I’m like, I have to stop redoing curriculum. I just have to They’re getting great results without me redoing it. I don’t need to redo it. We were talking about it and she’s the same way. And we were like, it’s, that’s just because you found an even more efficient way. Great. Go make it better. And I’m probably going to keep doing that. And I kind of just come to that realization of like, part of actually scaling is what I am doing with the curriculum is how I’m tweaking things is how I’m making things even easier for people so that they don’t need my feedback 24/7. And really taking how I think in my brain and putting it out there and going, hey, here’s the thought process. Now you can take that thought process and apply it. It’s also so powerful for people when they can do that on their own, because then they feel this autonomy that they don’t feel when just like a coach hands it to them. Right. And so that’s been just a very big realization of like, I, this, this hitting this goal is going to take longer than I initially, I guess, thought it would. And not for the reasons I thought it would, not because I can’t create the programs or anything like that. It’s because of myself. And it’s because my capacity is limited in time. I have only so much time in the day. I refuse to work more than 30 hours a week. I ideally wanna work less. So I just am literally at like a, well, sure, could I sign on, you know, X more people? We capped our— my VIP. I’m like literally capped at the VIP. Wow. 2, 3, 4 more people might want to sign on, but can I take them right now? Like, that’s a real thing to think. Like, I could, but will it put me a little over my weekly, you know, goal of working that I can’t— I really don’t have any wiggle room with that because of my boys, unless I don’t want to sleep, and I need my sleep. It’s very important. So anyway, this is just a very— this is a nice, like, diary release episode. And, you know, I’m also starting with a brand new mastermind. Not brand new, actually. 5 of the 10 are returning, which is really exciting. We have 10 members in the mastermind, 5 returners, 5 new peeps. It’s such a cool group. I’m so excited. We kick off as this is releasing. We kick off the next day. And it’s such a magical group. And I’m really, I’m just, I’m really excited to be going through this because I get to share. This is, part of what I love about the mastermind is I share in real time what I’m doing, how I’m processing, and the nitty-gritty, the behind the scenes, so that they can apply that and take that right away. And, you know, I think back in the day I would have like not shared this and been like, I’ll share it, I’ll share all this reflection once I hit it. Once I hit $100K cash months, I’ll be like, hey, here’s how I did it. Here’s the identity crisis I was going through. Here’s the the control freakness I was being in, you know, I was having, and I would share it after. But like— Yeah. And I recommend that for a lot of things, but for some reason, this is coming through very strongly that I have to share this now in the moment, and I’m trusting that, I’m leaning into it. And I’m very proud of what we’ve already increased. It’s pretty cool. It’s pretty great. Way ahead of last year, which is amazing. And we still have a far way to go. And one of the things that I really, I wrote down is I want to keep infusing fun into my business, into my content, but also just my business. I, I don’t want to just hit a goal to hit a goal. I don’t want to hit a goal as fast as possible just to hit a goal to say I did. That’s not why I’m doing this. Like, especially with my boys, I can’t do that. Like, I refuse. This is one of my friends, Taylor. Shout out Taylor Slango, who just had a beautiful, a beautiful new baby boy. And she posted something. I’m gonna not say it exactly correct, but she posted something the other day that was like, like, I think millennial, elder millennials especially, but we are, we realize like we are in the good old days right now. Oh my gosh. Literally gonna get emotional. Talk about a good hook. And as she said that, I was just like, oh wow, it’s so true. You know? And it took a lot to get here. Like my becoming a mom didn’t happen overnight for me. And there were moments I didn’t know if it would happen. And like, I was with my boys Wednesday from wake up, they woke up around 7:30 to noon. And And then a lot in the afternoon, like from like 4 on. We had a babysitter in and out on Wednesday, but I was there cooking and hanging out with them and her. And like that whole morning from 7:30 to noon, I’m like cherishing every second of it. I’m like, this is so cool that I get to be with you guys on a Wednesday, like for 5 hours in a row and just really be with you. And they’re at this like precious Oh, but it’s just precious age. And I say precious is probably the wrong word sometimes because they’re actually like animals most of the time. They’re crazy boys, but they’re so innocent. And like watching them discover things, I’m like, man, I don’t want to miss a second of this. I don’t want to miss a second of this. And so it’s why when I really was reflecting, I was like, I want to work even less than I am and make more. And I caught myself going, I guess you just have to like push this goal off. I guess you just have to like, you know, let go of it because being with them is too important and you haven’t figured out that other way yet. And then when I really got honest with myself, no, I did. I did figure it out. And I know the part that is going to take the most to change is my control. And letting go of it. And it’s easier said than done. It’s gonna take a bit. It’s gonna take a bit to work through, but I wanna just name it. As my relationship coaches say, name it, tame it. I wanna name it. I wanna get it out there so that I can really start publicly working on how I’m releasing control to really scale. Because man, we are, I am literally living the good old days right now, and I know I am, and I wanna soak every second up and like going into solo momming. It’s, you know, a lot. And I’m so excited for this weekend. I genuinely am so excited just to have all these precious moments with them, fully unplugged, fully just with them, you know? And I have a lot of those throughout the week. Like I’ve, we’ve structured our life to do that, but I want more of it. I just think I realized the last 2 weeks I want more. I just want even more of it. I want more, even more time with them cuz it really is going so fast. Wildly fast. It’s, it’s just, oh, it’s crazy. And it’s getting better and better. I hear parents say that all the time. It just gets better. And I know it does, but I, I think this is our first and second and, you know, first and last. So this is probably it for us. And so I’m really just trying to soak it up. Oh, okay. As I’m getting emotional, this went everywhere. Thank you for listening. Thank you for letting me Use you as my diary. I feel very, I feel very blessed right now. I just came off a weekend with my absolute best friend in the whole world, who’s been my best friend since freshman year of college. And we have very different lifestyles. We have very different lives. And we’re still best friends. And just being together refueled me in such a way of like, oh gosh, yes. I needed this. And so having that and being like, wow, I’m so lucky to have this person in my life, have my husband be like, go have the time with her, have our relationship coaches this week. We had an amazing breakthrough session that Mike and I needed to work on some stuff in a big way. And we did. Having the boys, being there with them, having amazing sitters, like having family, like all of these incredible clients starting this week. I have all these mastermind clients starting next week. Like I feel so I feel so blessed. It’s like overwhelming. And to take that away because I haven’t hit a goal yet that I said I wanted to hit in March, and past me would’ve been like, you should have hit by now. It’s— you’ve had enough time, is just so robbing me of this beautiful life I’m living right now. Yeah. So it’s like I am working on holding space for a goal and also really enjoying the process and not the rushing of it is what makes you miss out on all the other juiciness of life, you know? And I just can’t do that. I refuse to. It’s— I’m living the good old days right now. I gotta soak it up. So, all right. Thank you. I love you. I’ll see you on the next episode, and then on the next one, and then on the next one. You’re stuck with me. Okay, bye!